Pie anyone?

I’ve never really considered myself an “eye for an eye” kind of gal…perhaps I was wrong.

Last night while running the bath for the kids the 3YOG was running around naked, excited and just generally pleased to be getting a bath (perhaps I should bathe them more than once a week—KIDDING!)  So when the mini’s get excited there is no choice but to generate some juice from the pooch as well.  I guess he believes somewhere in there might be something fun for him too.  If nothing else, he gets to see his little peeps leap and he wants to be in the mix for all such occasions. 

The streaker finally settled back in the bathroom waiting patiently for the water to fill, hands on the side of the tub, jumping up and down.  The dog followed.  Now he couldn’t possibly give the allotted amount of personal space required of this situation.  He had to come in and stand RIGHT behind her…operative word in this story is “behind”…so this is where my revenge comes in…

The femme notices the pooch’s presence at her rumpus and proceeds to sit on his back and swoosh back and forth as though he was some sort of Canine Caboose Cleaner…a use for a dog, that prior to yesterday, I had not considered.  Oddly, he just stood there taking it.  Hubba Hubba and I laughed with hysterics as the mini showed no signs of stopping and seemed to be having a great time.  The dog simply looked annoyed and a bit miffed but he was getting some attention (albeit an ass-wash)…he wasn’t going to be leaving anytime soon.  I wanted to chime in and say something as “The Mother”…this was inappropriate behavior, was it not?  And isn’t that what I am in charge of around here?  Thwarting inappropriate behavior?  Ruining all good times especially when heavily cloaked in toilet-humor?  I could have SWORN that was in the job description.  I certainly know MY mom was in charge of that.  So, really, I should say something...

I am milliseconds away from ending this exfoliation escapade when it hit me…this is payback!  This is retribution.  This is direct and comparable vindication for every single time the dog has come in from the great outdoors, only to rush down the stairs, do a few victory laps around the basement and proceed to wipe his hiney on my carpet as though it is just a large slice of toilet tissue!  (Not sure if anything he does makes me angrier or more disgusted—aside from the barfing of course.)  But this was the perfect act of reciprocity in my eyes.  I don’t think the two will correlate in dog-speak but it made me feel a whole lot better about the situation.  Now don’t think that the next time he stops, drops and wipes I am going to be hailing over him with a midget looking for my immediate gratification but this was just a small slice in the pie I like to call “Sweet Satisfaction.”  A tick mark in the “Mom” column in the game of Dog vs. Human, if you will.  Rarely am I awarded these triumphs and today I sit, basking in the glory!  Hope you have the opportunity to “bask” today as well!