Some people tend to get the most information from their kids at night as they lay them down to sleep. I suppose being that I have been blessed with what can only be described as a "sleeper from hell" I am not one of those people. My moments of clarity regarding my gal come while she is atop her thrown...the porcelain one. I don't know why this summons her deep thoughts and worldly questions but I have grown to except this and almost embrace it. I will take "quality" time wherever I can get it and that includes being amongst excrement and odor.
Out of the clear blue sky (where most of these Toilet Tidbits come from) she starts talking about her name. She looks dead at me and says "Mom, I really don't like my name!" She's never voiced any distaste for it previously so I am a little taken aback and proceed to ask her why. She then explains: "Because it has the "My" word in it and it makes me feel like I'm saying everything is "Mine" and I don't like that." Perhaps this lends to the reason she is constantly claiming territory in the land but that is beside the point. So I take the bait and ask her what name she would prefer. Without hesitation she chimes in (as though she has been thinking about this for much longer than this 15 minute eradication) with her answer: "Chase! You can call me Chase because that would mean that you'd have to chase me all around." After pontificating the notion of having 2 kids with the same name, I do believe smoke began to pour from my ears. I pointed out that it would be a bit difficult to discern one Chase from the other and she assured me, "Oh if he runs away you won't have to handle it. I will put on full speed to get him." Hmmm, now THIS is a plan I can get on board with. I chase you and you chase him. That doesn't sound at ALL crazy. She is not as speedy as her brother and much less erratic. Boy Wonder starts off in a straight line as though there is a jet pack attached to his back and then suddenly he cuts to the left in a jutting, zig zagging motion, much like the talents of Adrian Peterson (HA-I can only hope!) Now I am 20 years removed from my soccer training and hate to admit that those hard "cuts" aren't as easy and fluid as they used to be. I do fear a blown ACL/MCL at some point in my competition as a mom. I have been pondering lately what the first injury to put me on the disabled list is going to be. For some reason I am leaning toward having a tooth knocked out but I suppose that is because that has been one of my biggest fears for all of my life is losing a tooth in combat. Probably the very reason that I chose swimming over the abundance of other sports I played as it always ended up in the "Least Likely Arena to Lose a Tooth in Battle" column of life but that is a different story altogether. All these previously recorded thoughts about my son needing to be garbed in protective gear and I feel that I should probably be outfitted in the same. Again, another story for another day...
At the end of the day I just found it interesting that Girl Wonder was so attuned to her sensitive side and the "vibe" her name is putting out there. The only thought I ever gave to my name is the fact that "Jo" rhymed with soooo many unappealing and insulting words but this realization didn't come until at least 4th grade when my classmates start recognizing the same. To be a "Ho" at age 8 was quite a tall order. I didn't even figure out how insulting "Blow" was until a much later date. And now realizing that I have doomed my daughter to the very same name fate I am beginning to think that this Conversation from the Throne will be continued a few years down the line. Now I will hold the interest of seeing if she can actually reach the age of 8 before her friends embark on this name-calling frenzy which sends her to the court house with a Request for Name Change. And so the Circle of Life continues :)
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