Zombie Land...

It's been awhile since my last entry. My brother, sister-in-law and nephew came and stayed with us last week so I was busy entertaining and cooking and subsequently gaining about 10 pounds with their stay. Looks like it's back to real life now. It was nice to live in "Vacation Land" for awhile. That is what our house transforms into when we have guests. All bets are off, we throw the rules out the window and generally let the kids run amok. The house is renamed Casa de Cunningham and we run it like a bed and breakfast. But unfortunately with "Vacation Land" comes "Zombie Land"....

Now stop me if you've heard this one, but do your kids not turn into COMPLETE zombies when they get the treat of television?!? Seriously, a bomb could go off in the room and they would hardly notice. Being that we had guests we allow them to lavish our kids with spoilage and that occasionally comes in the form of TV. We try not to let them watch too much as they tend to turn into ornery, crabby demon spawn in the event that they are asked to pry themselves away from the set. But being that their family was here and they rarely get to see/spoil them we allow it.

The youngest is by far the worst. He would wake from his evening slumber and the 1st thing out of his mouth was "SHOWWWWS!?!?" This was as insistent as it was longing. You can tell he is really yearning for this request. When he comes to me I simply turn my head as though I don't hear him. So he moves on to the next unsuspecting victim posted in the kitchen. Barely awake and main-lining their first cups of coffee in hopes of withstanding the onslaught, he works his way over to them. Begging for TV has become the Moose's new favorite past time. He figures he has nothing else to do and nothing to lose so he embarks. To me, this is like nails down a chalk board. A whine equals an automatic NO in my world. Evidently not all humans are as irritated by the whine as I am...some are even drawn to it--obviously. So the sucker at the table with coffee in hand is gently led down the stairs to the set. They are coyly persuaded to the remote and cleverly convinced to put on some electronic entertainment. The present Show de Jour is Dino Dan. This kid will literally say "DinoDan? DinoDan? DinoDan?" over and over until your head about bursts. This is then followed by "MamaMamaMama" and of course "Pweeease! Pweeeease! Pweeeease!" But being that his requests were submitted to for a week straight he now believes that this will continue. Therefore, all of the work that I have done in the past 2 years to sway him from the set has been undone in 6 short days. My pediatrician will be THRILLED come our next appointment.

I am just constantly amazed at the power and impact these shows have over my kids! Am I alone here? If I dare turn off a show be it Dora, Diego, Backyardigans or Olivia I catch the wrath of them. I liken the effects of TV to that of addiction. It is as though they are possessed by the Big Box and when it is taken from them they turn into angry crack addicts jonesing for another fix! It seems as though after a showing they are irritable, cranky, demanding and sassy--this is their detox phase. That is until they get another "hit." Then they are compliant, sweet and agreeable (this is when I have been conditioned to ask for kisses from my boy because he is hypnotized and in the zone, not knowing what he is doing. He gives them freely and willingly but it kind of makes me feel bad because I know he doesn't mean it--much like kissing someone who is drunk.) I remember about 10 years ago a bunch of Japanese kids were rushed to the hospital after watching a Pokemon episode that sent them into epileptic seizures. SEIZURES!? Are you kidding me!

Perhaps I am taking this a bit too far but the similarities are very apparent to me. I personally do not like television and find it to be annoying noise. I am not a bon-bon mom who has it on all day for soap operas, news or for "background noise"...I have enough of that from my kids. I find when it is on and I am not watching it I am irritated, distracted and impatient. It only makes sense that they feel this way when they are not allowed to watch.

Now I am not saying that they haven't learned their fair share of information here. I can't slam this TV thing entirely. They can both count to at least 10 in two languages, know countless animals that BC (before children) I didn't even know existed and have learned a ton about sharing and caring, dancing, rhyming, singing and family. But I do believe a diligent parent could teach them the same by reading and talking to them (which is the method I implored out the gates of this parenting thing.) I guess what I am saying is I find this whole thing irritatingly fascinating.

Maybe this is a new reality TV series..."Toddler TV Detox"...Kids going through the withdrawal phases of television addiction and the parents that love them. I know we will be having clinic hours all day every day for at least the next week. The only cure, as I see it, is to get out of the house and do something. Precisely where I am headed. Until next time...breath deep and conquer! "Mommy from Zombie Land" signing off!