Ok so it took me a minute to decide if I wanted to share this or not because I still feel awkward recalling the details but alas I wouldn't be true to myself if I kept something like this within so here goes:
Now I must set the stage for the situation and throw "benefit of the doubt" into the equation...I was with "The Moose" yesterday grocery shopping as he is continuing to drink us out of house and home in regard to milk. (60+ ounces/day for anyone wondering) I knew if I didn't get another gallon ASAP heads would fly. So, while waiting in the check out line (which was going slower than normal) I noticed that the boy was jonesin for his smack so against my better judgement I broke down and opened the gallon right there in the line. Topped off the kid's cup and sheepishly placed the gallon back on the conveyor. The woman in front of me obviously sensed my discomfort with my decision as I do believe I had "White Trash" written all over my face from the faux pas. And being that I was shopping in Boulder I honestly felt a little trashier than normal about the choice. ANYWAY, so as she is noticing this she decided to calm my fears and make me feel better about the situation by sharing a little something of her own experience (insert aforementioned "benefit" here). She proceeded to say "Oh girl, don't even worry about that! I can't tell you how many times I opened a gallon of milk in the store for my kids." Whew! I think the color is returning to my face and I am feeling a bit more at ease. Then she proceeds, "Ya know when my kids would finally get their cup in their hands and put it to their lips, their eyes would seriously roll back in their heads! I swear, milk is like SEX for them!" Silence. Ummm....uhhhh....yaaaaa. Did you really just say that out loud? Am I hallucinating? We are STILL in public, right? I looked at the checker and got no help. I then replayed the conversation in my mind hoping for a clue that would illustrate that I had actually welcomed that kind of information. I looked at her again to make sure that I didn't actually KNOW her. All of these efforts came up fruitless. So am I wrong? Is this a totally inappropriate tid bit to share with a complete stranger in the line of the grocery in front of other respirating human beings or is it just me? Am I turning into a prude without my knowledge? This CAN'T be the case. Perhaps in another couple of years I will have so little modesty that I will be sharing the same story with someone I don't know, thereby making that person and any other individual within ear shot completely uncomfortable? I sure hope not, but I am quickly learning in life to "Never say never." Perhaps I have already crossed said line by sharing this story and NUMEROUS others that were never meant to leave the confines of my mind & home with you people? Someone please set me straight! I've somehow ended up in the Twilight Zone...
SHE was dreaming of sex herself which probably had not happened in a very long time:))
ReplyDeleteLOL Tammy! You are hilarious! LOVE it!
ReplyDeletelet me try to stop laughing before i comment (very long pause) ok.....krazykatiejo, first of all i'm so glad you decided to share this story...it's frickin hilarious!! second...as we get older the whole sex thing just isn't taboo like it used to be (in my opinion) with the whole sexual revolution it's common place to insert it into conversation. (esp among the single people out there) as inappropriate as it may seem, at least she wasn't sharing her own escapades with you...now that would be another story. she was only using it as a comparison as to give you a visual!!! lol!!! you know, we're so literal these days, why not that too? anyway, i've gone on and on. to answer your question, you're not a prude but you have been sheltered for a few years. and growing up with mary kascht as your mother doesn't help matters. that's all i have to say about that!
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