We recently discovered by way of Chinese delivery (proud recipients of a bonus calendar) that our son was born in the Year of the Ox. Stand alone, this information is unremarkable. When we delve deeper we find that the boy was nicknamed "Ox" by his mother shortly after birth. Partly because of his ginormous head circumference and partly because of his near immediate display of oxen-like personality traits.
So as we are looking through this "You bought so much shit from us we are thanking you with this ultra cool Chinese calendar" free-be we made some further discoveries...
Discovery #1- (already mentioned) Mr. Mini is an Ox.
Discovery #2- Ms. Mini is a Pig
Discovery #3- Mom is a Dragon & Dad is a Tiger (Rarrrr! :)
Learning all of this new information unfortunately gave Ms. Mini much delight. She found it to be hilarious that this calendar basically affirmed what mom had been saying all along and she embarked on the name-calling. "Ox" this and "Ox" that. "Don't do that, Ox!" "Come here, Ox!" Each time there was a giggle in her voice and a look of confusion on his face. As of right now, he isn't quite sure what this whole "Ox" thing is. Never having seen one in real life and not knowing any of the negative connotation regarding the species he is generally in the dark at this point. My fear is that this will continue for years to come (the moniker is really just too fitting) and perhaps it will be a self-fulfilling prophecy for him. He will, in fact, become a stubborn, bull-like entity and I will regret the day of Crispy Duck & Pot Stickers.
Then I take this a step further and foresee when he is old enough to figure out for himself what animal year his sister was born under. Though it won't be too hard as she has been running around proclaiming "I'm a Pig! I'm a Pig!" A "Pig" 3-year-old is cute--a "Pig" 13-year-old is not. I mean, that sort of name calling is grounds for just about anything and I have to say I wouldn't blame her. The thought of my little girl being called such an unsavory name bring shivers. Again, I'm hoping it doesn't send her straight to the Bon-Bons.
And then we prognosticate one step further and note that mom is a "Dragon." Really? Do I HAVE to be a Dragon? No Rooster? Sheep? Horse? I'd even take Monkey. But Dragon?! I had a teacher back in the day that we called The Dragon Lady and let me tell you we were not complimenting her. She could scare me into submission with just one glare. I don't think I spoke for that whole year and you can IMAGINE just how hard that was! I do not want my minions to fear me though I suppose with the track record I have already established I am well on my way. You could tell me to "Rage On!" and it would bare quite a different reality today than it did 10 years ago...although at each segment of life quite fitting for where I was/am.
But at the end of the day I suppose they are going to be who they are...be it Ox or Pig. I will no doubt, fill my Dragon role. There shall be no self-fulfilling prophecy. I suppose this is simply a wake up call for me in regard to doing my best to give them strong senses of self. That the task at hand from here on out should not be to keep the names from being called but to keep the stereotypes from being ingested. As we've seen in recent years, it's tough stuff growing up these days. Bullying is at an alarming level and kids are taking drastic measures--both the givers and receivers. I guess I should be grateful that this nugget was brought to my plate so early. When they are given shit by their siblings at home at the very least one can play referee and teach them a few tricks of the trade while being the voice over their shoulder teaching them the truth about themselves. Not the lies of verbal abuse. Wow, re-reading that made me see that this is a TALL order--and again, I am reminded of what I have said to myself time and time again, "Isn't EVERY aspect of parenting?"
"Rage On" my fellow do-gooders--in whatever capacity of "rage" you can conjure! Release your inner Dragon and have a Grrrreat day! <insert dorky laugh here> :)
No comments:
Post a Comment